Tuesday, July 29, 2008

i find that i am very short-tempered nowadays.i seem to always break into fury whenever something just obstruct my trend of thoughts.i cant seem to get it over with.and its been bugging me since ever i started trainings and they took up so much of my time.come to think of it,its really may have been all these trainings.or maybe muhd was right about me just taking one day off and just kp the one teacher i dislike in the face.maybe this would help relieve my stress.
i can't believe that this is gonna end me.i have faced much more stuff than this,and certainly,its gonna end soon,i hope.i really hope for it.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

madness is just like gravity.it just needs alittle push.

well,its been quite a while since i last blogged.
latest craving:japanese pasta.this time,its gonna cost me quite a bomb.so still trying to save up.
CCA has never has such a place in my life before.not even ncc.this time,it too away my weekend's studying time.all the best jh,rmb the pact?ahaha.3 more weeks.
but it was rather nice today.it was the first time a total stranger spoke to me while i was rowing.
he too was a right rower for the C boat.and he came over to me and asked if i was doing okay.after saying the mechanics of the boat.he asked which sch was i from.and my surprise,he thought i was an ac boy.haha.what a joke...when my boat clearly wrote SP33.haha.anyway,it was nice to have somebody over to tell you jiayou!
need to train harder!and study harder!which means:no more team dinners,no more dragging of time to lepak over at FC5 after cooldowns,no more wasting of time dreaming away,my time,well,how to put it,extra time while im not rowing should be dedicated to study.at least for this remaining 3 weeks.



jiayou jiahong.....dont let madness succumb you again.try to cool down!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

happy indulgence


weeks go by pretty fast.its like just a few days ago that we went for dinner over at queenstown but in fact it was last wednesday.rea!lly!fast!
and i just had two rounds of oily food today!and had macs yesterday!CONGRATULATIONS!
i think these must stop.i must limit it to only once a week.man,if not i will really go chui during training.
but its a great thing that i fulfilled my wishlist of eating potstickers and a big mac meal!
potstickers at FC4 aint that great though.filling aint that fragrant.i miss xiao long bao at DTF!!!!must go have it!!been a long time since i had it.long long time.and i wanna eat dim sums!red star is my top 10 to eat stuff before i die!geylang one's is fine.

and today's rowing over at pontoon is fun.i wanna try that again!and rowing during the late afternoon is so much better than doing it udner the scorching sun on a saturday.wednesday is so much mroe relac.



4 more weeks!
pianging time.
imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.imnerd.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

injury

busy week.past and ahead.been eating alot these days.not sure why,but my stomach just doesnt seem to get full.alot of assignments not done and revisions piled up liek nothing.
gotta start revising dude.3 more weeks and its the semester exams.
how am i gonna do it?

Monday, July 14, 2008

jiahong is feeling all boiled up again!

part-timer


you don't deserve my respect!i dont care if you have taught in SP for 3 years or youre just a newbie.you just dont fit right in my category of teaching staffs!
the way you teach.its so boring!the module itself is such a failure.and yet you are trying to dry us of our passion of learning it.i don't find any meaning of continuing listening to you in class.One,cause the way you act,just doesnt fit right like a teacher!Two,you havent really infused in us anything.and yet,you want a FORMAL PRESENTATION done on SCIENCE.I bet you know nuts about it..and you want a 30min! presentation.I WILL TRY MY BEST TO CRAP THRU!
you are not fit for my respect.period!

Sunday, July 13, 2008

conflicts and pushy matters




spent the whole day over at sprint site yesterday.
very very tiring..and things were pretty rush too.from the preparation,late lunch,to the 6km.finally had a rest when everyone was done with their pullups.
still trying to learn the strokes of the C-boat.
y'know,i was wondering why i joined canoeing in the first place.was it the body or was it just the tan.its very demoralising to know that you join these water sports cause of these factors.it shows how superficial you are!and many a times,your thinking will escalate into commitments and responsibility.

well,then we arranged for a somewhat impromptu meetup.with wynn and leslie along with the usual fags of 2/3.and i evaluated that some things were pretty much important in arranging an outing.thats why i prefer to spend time with lesser people,preferbly,in small groups of 2-3.
cause things are much easier that way.
you know the amount of time we spent talking in on when and where to meet could be converted precious time.the money spent on those uneccesary calls could be avoided and be used to well,eat smth!
so i've decided that whenever im gonna meet someone,i wld first try to be the one to be called out,instead of organising.and then,will be the most flexible person,so that ican go well with majority.not that i aint.


procrastinated alot,and then cinema hopped.
haiii,saturday nights...so typical..everyone's out and spending time with their loved ones.
you see couples aplenty.little punk wannabes and well,rich executives.
what about my saturday nights?
am i gonna spend them,either with family or friends every fornightly.
or am i gonna find someone else to spend with..all those images of lovebirds holding hands and PDAing just makes you feel so inconfident and qurey if youre able to find someone.
JUST STP THINKING ABOUT THESE JH!
just relax.and things will come your way..you dont have to worry one.......


red cliff was pretty awesome.it was the second period film that i watched on the midnight slot.
the first was prolly the warlords.that flick was pretty chimology.much more than red cliff.and its good!
anyway.the entire film crew of red cliff was great.even though some of my friends weere complaining abotu how they paid for a half-past story.
i felt it was damn awesome.
takeshi was trying to act cute.but he's really damn handsome man!but its quite weird for him to portray zhugeliang.shldnt he be some macho general instead.
and lin chiling,she's the GODDESS man!she oh so tall,so beautiful,and model-like and so...wify towards tony leung.have to say that he's one of the luckiest man to ever walked the world.
though i felt sleepy all along the movie,and the theatre was so chockful of couples,i guess every midnight movie out will be pretyt memorable.

Friday, July 11, 2008

10july2008

had class outing!over at PS swensens.woohoo!
its been a long time since i had outings over at PS.the atmosphere was cool.but the menu was rather restricted.thought they had more extensive ones in the past.
so,i ordered a bbq half-chicken.pretty sweet with the bbq sauce.but its more of the talk with friends.
we had been saying about this outing for damn long time.so yesterday everyone decided to make some sacrifices,including me and we ended up having dinner on a weekday night.its so cool.bet you cant do this when youre in JC at this point of time.haahaha
and i bet we all had a whole lot of time man!


11july2008

school was shitty,yuen went damn fast with dna replication.and proceeded to mitosis already.
and i broke the promise that i made to myself about eating oily food cause i just took fried oyster today!its really damn good.
and its been ages since i last went to parkway parade.its really good to know that some thigns still remain the same over the years.
and selegie soy bean was also damn good.silky smooth beancurd
tau huay chuwe was thick and nice too.
and bused back to people's park to have dinner.fish soup wasnt that good.but the yong tau foo was damn good!!sadly,they had to raise the price to 3.50.


the world is just going too fast

Monday, July 07, 2008

prolly its just stress.

arghh!
i'm at my peak already.things are not looking very well for me these few months.both academically and spiritually and mentally and psychologically.i think im breaking down if i dont do something to calm myself down,or i could seriously be in deep shit.
i realised from friends and my own judgment that i have began to become more angsty,a characteristic that i never really possessed before.at least not to sure an extent that i had to have sporadic outbursts of temper to sustain my own sanity.
i never really showed attitude to fellow seniors before.even in NCC,even to the the worst nco that i had.i dont know why i became like this.and i seriously hope that things could return back to normal or that i can do something to reduce it.

spoke to wynn yesterday night.one thing he said really affected me.he asked me if i felt that i had no life.prior to that,i was already questioning myself in the afternoon as i was having lunch at my grandma's place and my relatives told me,quite sarcastically that if i didnt know how to swim,i shouldnt canoe.and that if my mother really alllowed that.that was really a big blow to my mind.and i kept thinking the whole afternoon and if i should really stay on.without the knowledge to swim.

touching on the no life part.its more of a aftermath of the initial euphoria of joining canoeing.many wanted to just train up and get the body.but once this thinking is over,a new wave of thoughts came to me.its more like,i wanna do something,try out something and commit and not be so free during the weekdays.i want it so that in years to come,i could look back and think,well,the last few years in SP had been a rather great time for me,for i had made really great friends,know people that i hadnt expected and most importantly,i didnt believe that i could be so determined to stay in the team.
for the last few years or perharps months,maybe even when i was in cj,i cant believe that i could row a c boat,or even balance on it.but now,all of it seems like in my reach.and that i didnt believe that 450 pushups was possible,but i have done it.


well,i guess no life isnt really no life.
perharps i need time to think all these thigns over.and well,priortise my time.for friends,for family and for trainings.
regarding the no life thing,i was pretty upset over it,and it has been bugging me since yesterday night.till now.and tomorrow's training already,i cant have these thoughts in me.

i know probably what people will tell me,they will say that well,jiahong,go for something you think.it depends on you,if you liek canoeing,just continue,you dont ahve to listen to others.but i know,i have heard all these.and i know,i cant really expect people to lead my life,i will have to decide for myelf.





5 more weeks to exams.
glen and i made a pact,we shall train for 3 more weeks before we stop all ccas and concentrate on our studies,afterall,we dont wanna retake any modules.
with lecturers moving like bullettrains through the topics,i cannot afford to lag,for bio,for chem and maths.

till then people,will update while i can.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

when leading a fulfilling life means having no life


yesterday was the worst day in my 10XXXXXXX life even if i would die and get whacked over and over again,i would still have to say that!the pushups just suck!totally.
its was practically wasting everyone away.and eventually i had to release some steam.which i guess i overdid it.and that i shouldnt have done that.its..well.haiz.
and its so awkward now la.
YOU SHOULD'NT HAVE SHOWED ATTITUDE!

I open my eyes
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light
I can't remember how
I can't remember why
I'm lyin' here tonight
And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away
No I can't stand the pain

How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I'm fadin' away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

Everybody's screamin'
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I'm slippin' off the edge
I'm hangin' by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can't explain what happened
And I can't erase the things that I've done
No I can't

How could this happen to me?
I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
As I'm fadin' away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

I've made my mistakes
got nowhere to run
the night goes on
as I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me?

Thursday, July 03, 2008

can you live a sad life happily?
push up


i have a thousand and one thoughts running through my mind while im in knock it down position.its really shitz when you are damn beat and drained of energy at the end of training and the last thing you wanna hear from the seniors is to hurry up,gather down at the benches there.and then,dear mr president will start his usual routine of knock-it-downs.
every moment is hallucinated to be the worst by my ever-so-weak mind.and i am there partially hanging,partially trying very hard to do the pushups,trying to make out when will all these end?when will he say.c'mon,last 10 ready?its your last 10.do it well and we can finish.
and ever so often,there will be a restart to 50,got people use leg supports.

you know how i feel,i really felt like giving up.its just so shitz.like a bloody routine that you do with your body but in the absence of the determination.its bloody determination that plays the most part man!and your missing out on it.haiz.i cant believe it.
just months ago,when you were still in NUM,hanlong was there asking eh you can tahan pushups anot."yeah".
then can la.and sherman was there being in sucha shocked state and asked that were you really serious about joining spct.
you know,im making false hopes.like a freaking party-pooper.like how can i?
its just 2-3 months into training and now you say you wanna give up just because of miniscule pushups.c'mon man.....you havent even proceeded to do your first marathon,then your first C event,then NCC.and now you even have the thought of giving up?haiz,i really cannot accept it myself.even though its only a small random thought,but hell?how can i.



its shitxzxzxwxzxwzwxzxzwxwzewxzwxwzwxzwxzwxwzxwzexzewxzewxezwxezwxezwxtztxtzxtztxtzxtztxztxtz


i need to be positive,and i need to train well.and go for polo trainings.i need the strength.most importantly.

glenn!from now on,we shall discuss about our results and future in our CCA.
tak boleh tank then we see how.
need to pioritise siaaaaaaaaa.