ok.its gonna be a hectic week again this time...
3 consecutive tests for 3 consecutive days......must work harder.

got a day off for gym today,will continue on thursday..

everyone else in the class is like working so damn hard,and getting an A for maths like is like a definite goal for all in 4/2,having mr lim pushing us so hard....and maybe its because of kiasuism,people are like taking 3 prelims paper per wk, and they are like not even ablt to finsh them off...friday is the deadline and im still left with 2 of them...haiz...

down for chem ATP this time round,failed energy changes,cant believe that everyone else ard me s like getting so much higher.and im sure my grades in the ppr will be affected by this...damn...have to work harder for electrolysis....


tmr's HCL test..arghh.....
i feel that this time,my class scored better in physics than last year.


sometimes no matter ow hard you study,you will still do badly,its all down to how you feel,somehow,when i think of getting nervous,i just forget everything else..haiz.

ok,maybe im thinking too much these days.how i just hope i could forget all the troubles in my sleep and wake up feeling afresh......

another friday,this time,flooded wif hw..
havent finished emaths probabillity hw,still left exmas papers to complete..arhhh....


wrote this on my 3min writing
duno why so depressed and love to write such stuff these days,even the CT was so....

If i ever lost this trust in friends,it would be difficult for me to find it back...
so wad YK said was true,really true..
havent had a good talk wif ppl for a long long time..my wkends are so damn filled...
and im drained.ncc,lets not talk about it anymore..

and i hope that i cld just conc on my work...lets forget bout everything else.

its gonna be the last wk of jans.quite fast.

out of 5 schooling days,4 are staying back to do stuff such as studying,gym,cca and stuff.only monday is free so we had lunch at clementi that day.quite nan de actually,if you might say.food was not bad,but the service just not so good.

ok,chem kena atp,argh..dunno why just cant cope wif these kind of calculations stuff..and its surprsing that i got so high for my cumulative frequency,maybe its just a bit of luck.....
gonna die for physics tmr.my worst sub.

and i feel like ss lesson is like shit.no meaning in seeing his mindmaps and messy writings and having students complete his essay qns just for the sake of gg home...find it so meaningless la.wads the point..does ur students learn anything..
its just tough to teach,so best is not get into this kind of field.


must eat more!
if not i wun grow..no point in gyming so much also.
if i cld just cope better wif my subs.8 subs.5 days a wk in sch+ wkeneds studying.how to la.
somemore got this got that.ever since skl reopen i havent had my ideal wkend yet.and i dun deny the fact that sec 4 life is liddat.

maybe im just not making full use of it yet.

well,i dunno where to start but i broke down todae,yes,i cried.
haiz,maybe it was the stress or maybe i thought too much.

but really felt better after that.

i have always been telling myself to not judge the book by its cover,but all along,i have tried and den i realised that the person behind the face really doesnt mean any harm or bad.
maybe its my selfish perception again.

haiz.

well,people say that i will not be coming back to serve cause of wad i have said on my blog or maybe how i felt..but maybe i cld prove them wrong.
i know im not such a person that will ji chou.and i wun remmeber and have any hard feelings.

see,i even pitied those ppl when they got knocked down..its just sympathy...haiz.im too sympathetic,i just cant be aggresive and people will just crawl over me,and just let them be.

at least i feel so much better when i see smiles on others.

我的心唱首歌给你听
歌词是如此的甜蜜

going to be etched in my mine cause my partner is forever singing it.

no time to really write thoughts.so maybe tmr

very shack and very sick in the afternoon.
glad that i had a good afternoon nap.and everything became well aft that.

going quite well.
have benn trying to speak to some of the sec 3s,hope they will understand my "ku zhong" and heed me,if not im a loser alr,a big fool.

i believe that whenever one was feeling down,a person's laugh or smile could brighten up his day.


just as i was tying the skl flag tdae,joey was there standing,at first it seemed weird to me,cause its not always that i had someone looking at me and i always got jeered and laughed at by peers cause i always kena flag.but it was nice to see a person's smile back when you gave them yours.it just brightens up one's day.
and it was a lesson for me.

i know there are rumors ard,but i say we let them fall on deaf ears.lets not care about wads rd us.if those naysayers fell that wad they did was fun and a point of laughter,let them be.people say they will feel sick,but i believe wad ivan has said,someday they will believe and come to know that wad they did was sumthing that hurt themselves.

ok,maybe i have said some heavy things,but i hope that things will just resolve

been bugged by my conscience all of a sudden,maybe after reading other ppl's blog ba..
its seems so fast,after saying all that i wanna do for my unit and stuff,and now that alex's is back.,well,i have to reconsider my decision?

but there are time a leader has to stand up for what he believe and push on

its just that tough,ppl won't listen to you.its just like this,thats why the unit needs people like me,a scapegoat,a fool who believes others easily and most of all a very gullible specialist that tries his very best.
the point now is to nurture the next batch.i may have to plan a camp very soon.and it aint my first,i believe its doable,at least much easier than ubin,haiz,thinking bout it just makes me feel so miserable...i've made my point to someone,and its disappointing to see someone fail and all shrivel up rite infront.haiz......

trust me, solve all issues in sec 3 asap, when u reach sec 4, your time will be more cramped..

haiz...

its tuesday.friday is part c imt.

guess another demerite for us.


had a full dinner and thought of this.
our body is like a powerhouse,how much we eat depends on our stomach,and eventually they will be digested and excreted..the more we put in,the more it works,much like muscles,and after getting used to the same stuff everyday,once in a while you chow down much more stuff and it gets way uncomfortable and its tries as hard to work..


very metaphorical,very chim,i know..just that recent times dun permit me to have deep thoughts.

maybe i'll just nid another"leng jing qi" just to sort out my own stuff,allow my own thinking to be rejuvenated and well? feel well...

CT and tests coming down alr.
and im actually aiming for a poly but due to some serious considerations.well,may have to tot it all over again.

im very kiasu and i know you cant have eveything you want.

i wanna aim for SAF scholarship.
i wanna earn a degree in faster ways than others.
i wanna go OCS
i wanna go TP biotech course and so just bcs of aquaculture module.

but i dun nid big bucks in later part of my life,just my passion and a sum of money that i can live off and at the same time give my parents.

maybe these thoughts are all temporary,maybe after few yrs or more my thinking may change.well,its tough and not easily understood.maybe someday all these kiasusim may be changed bcs of my changed thinking.

its just not easy....

its so fast,many ppl are alr worrying bout where they wanna go after this year..
for me,im still unsure yet.haiz.
i've been thold that jc would be a better route leading to uni but poly ogffers more hands on stuff.
if im not gg jc,why the hell did i ever take hcl in the first place.
i know im a more academically person,and not really suited to poly cause i wunt be able to follow and stuff.but then again,i alr know wad i wanna do..maybe its still needs much more cosiderationms,atferall,decisions could change.

how am i gonna cope wif emaths,i think my amaths is so much better..maybe bcs im a much more straight person,capable at following rules..lol

nothing much these days..just gg skl and coming back home for revisions and hw.

well..look man.
monday chem test and i still here typing away...

these days....are so damn packed,almost have to stay back everyday to do stuff or go for lessons.

and i feel that gym is my portal of destress....lol..who doesnt wan a to die for body.

and ncc is stressful now too..aint have time to organise sutff.have to find time though,and wif alex ard,im sure its much for relax..

im a loner..really,haiz..

so,second wk...damn man,careless mistakes in my amaths paper,histograms unfinished.

who says you cant do better in amaths den in emaths,ill prove.

and the beatty paper so damn tough.too frustrated to continue doing.and there goes my wkend agn.....

and thanks to all the ppl who were wif me on my bdae.
thanks really alot for the cake.

dunno wad to type.but im gonna study real hard these days..
sometimes,

seems like im gonna do alot more travelling by myself from this year onwards
sundays are mostly occupied.
so have to chiong hw on friday nites.

arhhh...CT s are coming...so fast..no mood to do CL compo tmr....

until now,have tried 3 kinds of gelato.first was venezia,recommended by my cousin...great
then was new zealand natural..also great
den tried a new one,haato at serangoon grdens..not bad,but i still prefer venezia...lol...
have yet to try ben and jerry.



gonna chiong...cya another time..

its just 2 days into sec 4 life and everything seems to be so stressful,seats have been changed,things looked more lifeless and all around me ppl are slogging for their points.

im in a surrounding where ppl are so concerned over their l1r5s....arhhhhh..
even the outlook of stuff have seem to change..
\
its been a different surrounding all in all.
even the NPs have given up hope,all we wan now is just hope to be able to concentrate on our Os...and it seems like so many of us cant wait to be ORDed....it just seem so fast at the pace thigns are gg..

even the Nps are loosing down...wad bout my morale..


i may be a loser.
i may talk lots of craps and talk much stuff that i cant do.
i may be a pushover.

but so wad?they think im a loser,let them be...some ppl just dun get their responsibilities right.
i have done my part,and now its time for you to do yours,if you fucking arent able to do up stuff,its ur fault to face the music...i have tried my best and pls,gimme a breathing space,im not superman.

some things in life just dun work out,no matter how you try...
its so darn tough to chnage a culture.

its just awhile b4 everything gets back to normal again..
ppl think admin SUCKS,i know it does.I want to be ORDed,i cant stand to be in this awkward position and be pushed like how you did in sec 3...

2006 Nov and Dec hols.
wad have i done.

i still rmbed how i chionged for my Amaths paper..that night.i had coffee and did all the way till 12 plus,also was on the fone wif eugene..
and guess wad,i got one of the best results for my amaths.

conquered on mount ophir wif few of my platoon mates.a sight to behold and an experience to remember.

went for my first shooting comm.screwed up the whole wholly thing.

went for several gatherings.
first was 3/2 class,things went well,had whole lot of time there.

second was 2/3.
had lots of fun too.

went to sentosa wif my frens,had a good time too.tried lugeing for the first time.

went for my first camp wifout buddies.i must say i really had a tough time in the beginning cliqueing,but it was real fun till the last day.really emotional and i must say its the best camp ever,everyone were close,almost to the verge of tears during the sentback..scorpio 1 rawks.

this was the beach

just came back from bintan.well,sort of.landed back in SG yesterday..have some great fotos..
there was this 2kilo pasir panjang beach..omg its damn nice..havent really seen a 2km beach at nite.its gotta be one of the best.

thats at the jetty,just playing wif the exposure thingy.





dun really know how to write captions below the pcs,so just gonna write and post a file of pics..
nite scene at the beach is one of the best.bintan is not really a shopping place,just some island to unwind and itg boasts a great beach.,though not the best.

abit uneasy bout the MINDCHAMPS thingy tt im gonna attend when skl reopens..its like a complete waste of money and time in my opinion...haiz well,maybe my perception will change...its gonna take up my sundays the whole of it till march.ahhhh....
wad does it take for one to be clever and wise and study hard and smart...haiz..