to me,the scent of a food matters the most.who doesnt anyway...
the dinner today was a spoiler...the first dish i shld say.

i believe many people have different opinions on things in life,even food critics..one that appeal to you may not appeal to others..so i shld say we must learn to look at things more open-mindedly.

not that i want to destroy the store's repuatation or wad,but it seems that things were a lil umlucky today.
the shellfish had a rotten stench...maybe it wasnt fresh or wad..shld i say

haiz,i dont know...it worried me much and i coulnt really enjoy it when people spoke about how bad it was...kinda saddening when the place is going to be demolished soon...

and the thing that surprised me was the peculiar dish of steamed shark's head..the firs time i had in my life.kinda gelationous....and it was really nice.but caused a deep hole in one's pocket..

well,i still have that imagination of that stench in my mind..but i guess not everything that appears good on the wanted list may appeal to everyone.i suppose

spent money today.bought a pair of shoes.
went orchard,walked ard,surprisingly they had an adidas sponsored soccer game at the atrium.some players were really good,can be the standard of st.the way that guy dribbled reminds me of st.
went walking ard again,lol,never gets sick of this..set my sights on a puma bag,but its kinda awkard if i carried it to school cause its those how to say grip bag...still contemplating.
i hate this,i keep contemplating,and i was lucky that the converse promo was still ard today...lucky me.

always so wishy-washy...like this how to do big things...haiyo.
look at this,saw jeff wang at queensway and he was like sitting few seats away from me,and ye i didnt approach for autograph....silly me...so damn wishy-washy....

and everytime such things happen,i will always be regretted with the outcome...shit..damn...i mus get myself working...set me decisions and do it.JIAYOU!

i want a body,seriously,high metabolism rate sucks,but i like it, rather have it skinny than fat..fat is so diff to get rid of.
i want to eat more,people throw me food..throw me anything and i must eat..ahhhhh
recess,make me eat too....scold me....reprimand me...no matter wad make me eat..

i must make a body out of this 3 months b4 Os,once i pass out..ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........

maybe all along wad he said was true.i felt as if i was a sucker man..maybe i shld nt have spoken so much.you see,if i dun talk,ppl say i dao and if i say too much,im afraid that i will land in trouble.
maybe shldnt have gone back to sch today..spent like half an hr doing bio and maths while waiting for their Os to finish.then went to help sort out the amaths papers.
people think that im in some kinda depression or wad but no,some just dont understadnd how i feel.,its been a long time since i ever had a good chat with people around me.

whatever,these things will not occupy too much..i believe there's still alot of other things to think bout

i finally know wads bugging me.
i've got a serious social problem.after speaking to jiawei during hcl lessons and ivan on the bus.i felt so much better.i guess its not to late to change b4 i get out of this school.

hmm first.i make frens by giving in to their requests..i feel thats so damn tsk..like wad jw said,i believe that true frens are made by a long term basis,by firm relationships.not like these little things.thats why i kept giving in stupidly.thats how strong rooted rs are built.not many ppl will appreciate and be as understanding as those around me.and i shld say that im much blessed to have so understanding ppl ard.it aint the same in the society.

second..after going so much confidence boosting and leadership courses,i feel that ive a big regret.i dun make full use of them..and look,now.everytime i tries to initiate a talk or say hi or sumthing so simple,i tend to push back and delay..some things cant be delayed..some chances will slip away..and i have gone thru many slipped chances...the adrenaline starts pumping and suddenly,you back out bcs of some idiotic reasons,you think too much boy.
i guess i will start with saying morning to ppl ard me.and the friendly guard at the gate in the morning..heh

i guess that will be all for today.

ridiculous man.why i got myself into this mess.shit.why must i help them do the chem car.shit

ok went out today,went for a swim at clementi in the morning,met jw and gone on mrt,cant believe he forgotten about his wallet when he goes out..and i didnt know you cld tan yourself at ur neighborhood swimming complex.and it took just half an hour to achieve all this red..gonna go sentosa next time.went botak jones for lunch.didnt know jw was so health-conscious.polished up the plate of salad like nothing.

next was basketball with,sweatted it out..so many japs at the cc.

nothing much today.cant say wasted my sunday la.still got quite alot of things i didnt do yet.so i shall try to complete as many during the june hols

i dont understand.
maybe its just that i dont know how to express myself.or that i dont spend enuff time witht hose around me,allowing me to know me well.i just wanna have a good talk with someone that knows me and care for me.
changing is not about being nice to others.im alr so so,and if i continue,wad will happen?haiz..i dont know,if i decided that i chnage,why in such ways that allows people to bully you.wtf man.i dunno..

i dunno why but its kinda diff to change at an instant...oh i just dunno...maybe i need more of these obs kind of thing.or isit just me.let me face it.im a very ego person,i may not know how much damage i have inflicted on those around me.and i may never catch it.

im very tired today after the gym and things,losses are very great...now body reverted back to normal already.so if i gave up now,i guess all the efforts of wad i did over the past half a year is useless.
nothing much to say about today.just hope that tmr will be better.

i feel guilty.somehow,im more aware of how i speak and how i treat ppl now.all that insensitive stuff can really hurt.and i feel that this is really the extreme and you cant control 100% of wad youre trying to do.its just too fake..well,how people think of you is always present,but try not to overdo those antics that irritate ppl and make ppl think as if they are like you.
i must understand that not everyone if like me,and i may well have to change to suit how others may feel.tsk.i dunno wad im writing,and i think this is going nowhere.

maybe i need more eu courses..shit.i find them really useful at least till now...its like when you think that when you are so more matured than others when someone who's more understanding comes and tell you that you aint interested in how others feel..sometimes,you just cant be contented with wad you are.=D.and,at least its better now than later,i dun wanna kena all these during army or worse in the society when ppl stays away from you and thinks that this guy so hao lian,or like he thinks he so good and i end up hanging out with people that are in the lowest forms or wad...seriously,i dunno why am i typing all these...its not bout flattening my big ego..i know i have a big ego and after having it for so long,its tough to get it deflated,you just cant accept it...ahh shit.

sometimes,life is not all gossips and fun with your pals...im now trying to find back how i felt alright bout myself..i was never satisfied with how i am or isit...tsk.after so little consideration today,maybe i have gona a lil overboard with stuff..maybe its back to times at the beginning of sec 3,when i felt so careful bout how i will offend ppl ard or how i am to them..and now,thinking that everyone ard knows you,you start to get alil more relaxed,you let yourself out and stuff..

shit...and i aint asking for people to pity me..maybe its just self-pity here.i guess all these wadever you call is enuff..3 paragraphs and it well can be a short compo..hah...i cant even look after myself,hah and i wanna talk about liking people...wad a big joke.hah

my results are shit.
failed amths like nothing,the first time ever leh..and its bcs of the fact that all kinds of qns are lumped together and i forgotten clean all the formulas..and physics..paper 2 failed like nothing also
and im glad that i did well for the 2 pracs,im really glad,this means that my prac skills are okay,though i got a few problems understanding the physics qn,so gonna brush up on that....

like an unpolished diamond,you await the discovery of something fascinating,something that will awe you.

many think that myes are the testament for your qualifying of the Os....and i think that i can do better..so many like ys and ivan are giving up their hopes of gg jc..wth man..they think this mye is everything.no lor,i still have the june hols.

hmm,considerating to be a clt..wad a joke..
maybe its an impulse saying..i mean how much can i contribute..and now,im looking forward to my passing out..its so ironic....at one point,you are thinking how you are able to keep ur hair,being free without any teachers disrupting you..
and plus,its a good experince,i mean the course....atfer hearing wad my cuz said..but im beginning to think how thsoe days cld be free....well,its not the time yet,i still got a long time to make up my mind..

how vulnerable is friendship....and im always in a situation whereby i offend ppl...me and my words..hah.
had a terrible start today..wld be good if i hadnt had a churning stomach when i tried to sleep...guess i kena gastric probs...man..when can i recover or shld i take an mc..

ok papers done..had a day out today..tmr still got class.
saw spidey 3..much of a romance story,about how ppl needs to understand one anther and stuff..den the fighting scenes...those explosives threw by the goblin.those symbiote thingy...and the high frequency sounds that the symbiote cannot tahan...
and ivan went gaga over river island..wtf la,so ex,so much more high end than topshop,and one singlet cos like 50 over...manz..hes loaded...

i wanna club someday.maybe im not strre-smart enuff..ppl thinks that im an honest,innocent guy,but i find it hard to lie sometimes,like when doing some illegal stuff...shall get some lobang at the end of the year after all these nonsense.

fucked up for amaths....maybe havent practised enuff for differentiation...and think not gonna do well for a lot of stuff....
was swearing all the way when doing all those qns...and i guess the invgilators must be thinking that this guy's nuts...
how?
just one more day and im going for mother's day feast...haiz..if i gave up now,wldnt everything be so damn wasted....maybe doing tys ltr...
everyone laments that the paper was tough...even those in 4/1..haiz..

one last day!

hmm,been a lousy wk..
its the exams period and i find myself slacking away.
nd gosh,just now when i saw the calendar,those that show in months interval,i found out that its just another wk b4 everything finishes...woohoo...i more week,maybe i shall just concentrate for this week..

haiz,my house is in a mess..i guess my bro's getting too out of hand...anyway,its not my prob..its his life,just cant stand some things that he does to irritate me,causing me to fly into rages and end up fighting...lol..and in the end,i still have to give in to him...haiz.sad life..i rather spend my time out of house when he's ard....

and the o lvl fears seem to be ok after the MYEs...i think ill be playing alr...lol..and i cant wait to start training agn..to think that this strain can cost so much...